Rory Said
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Signalling and costly signalling

A signal is only believed if it was expensive, effortful, or risky to send.

Conventional thinking

Take a message at face value. What matters is what's said.

Rory’s inversion

What matters is what it cost to say it. A message is only believed if sending it was expensive, effortful, or risky.

Sutherland's recurring argument is that humans don't take communication at face value. They factor in the cost, effort, and skill behind it, because only a costly signal is hard to fake. A handwritten note works because it took time; a flower is, in his phrase, "a weed with an advertising budget"; an engagement ring is an upfront expense that proves long term intent; and a suit and tie function as a proxy for probity that's cheap to read, precisely because dressing badly is easier.

He pushes this into some genuinely provocative territory: education is partly used to signal possession of scarce resources, a lot of altruism is long term selfishness in disguise, and a deliberately eccentric, gratuitous gesture can do more trust building work than a rational, efficient one, since efficiency is exactly what a cheap fake would also offer.

The Counterpoint

Costly signalling theory is close to unfalsifiable. Almost any expensive or wasteful looking behaviour can be retrofitted as a costly signal, turning a genuine evolutionary biology insight into an all purpose justification for extravagance a sceptic would just call waste.

236 verified insights in this theme

236 verified insights in this theme

panel22 June 2026
Verified
the reason you had to commission a Fabergé egg was the gold was very expensive, the craftsmanship was very time-consuming. You couldn't just have a lot of people just grabbing hold of gold and making random eggs

Rory, drawing on 35 years in advertising, explains why the commission model of creative production made sense only when production was expensive, ahead of asking whether cheap AI production reverses that logic.

The Bottleneck Podcastwith Elfried Samba, Josh Hart
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panel4 June 2026
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Loyalty TVwith Dan Bennett, Charlie Hills
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panel10 May 2026
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The Bottleneck Podcastwith Elfried Samba, Jamie Bartlett
Watch at 37:33
interview17 February 2025
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Modern Wisdomwith Chris Williamson
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interview17 February 2025
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Modern Wisdomwith Chris Williamson
Watch at 1:12:58
interview17 February 2025
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Modern Wisdomwith Chris Williamson
Watch at 1:18:15